Thievery

 

“Last night I finally got a chance to take a shower at home!” Alice announces as she lets the warm water cascade over her back.

            We’ve all just finished our swims in the Kennedy pool. Another success beating the crowds. Though on this Sunday, it wasn’t as bad as I had anticipated. Everyone left the last half hour. Maybe they had the schedule wrong and thought the pool closed at 12:00 instead of 12:30? Whatever. It was nice to have a lane to myself for 30 minutes. A rare luxury these days.

            “Why don’t you usually take a shower at home?” Violet asks.

            “I live with my 23-year-old granddaughter,” Alice rolls her eyes. “I’m afraid she’ll steal from me.”

            “WHAT?” I cry, astounded. “You really think your granddaughter would steal from you while you were in the shower?”

            Alice shrugs. “Don’t know. But I know what I did when I was her age.” She laughs, throwing her head back to rinse the shampoo out of her hair, the suds covering her worn, wrinkled skin.

            I thought about it. I did steal. But not from my grandmother. Though maybe I would have if I’d lived with her. I took small change out of the bottom of my mom’s purse. I don’t think she ever knew or if she did, it was so little that she didn’t care. Plus, I thought I was doing her a favor cleaning out the bottom of her purse.

            Then there was Alpha Beta. In Irvine. I used to steal candy bars and then run out through the automatic doors before anyone could catch me. It was thrilling and stupid. They only cost 70 cents at the time. Not like I couldn’t have bought them. But I was so bored. There was NOTHING to do in Irvine except play tennis, swim, and steal.

            Now that I think of it, I did, in a manner of speaking, steal from my Grandma Birdie. We always bought her pounds of See’s Candies for holidays, her birthday, Mother’s Day. We’d keep the wrapped boxes in the fridge until it was time to give it her. I’d sneak into the kitchen, open the fridge, pull out the box and carefully unwrap the box, being sure not to tear the paper. Then, I’d root around in the bottom of the box, stealing a prime chocolate cream or Bordeaux, move the remaining candies around so it would look like it was still a full box.

            But she always knew. One year, when I was older and didn’t do this anymore, she told me that she wasn’t fooled.

            “Why didn’t you say anything?” I’d asked her.

            She gave me her Cheshire Cat smile, “I wanted to let you have your fun.”

            She was like that.

“I remember one time,” Violet says now, “that my son stole my car.”

            “How’d he do that?” I asked. “Were you asleep?”

            “Yes. He just took my keys and drove over to his girlfriend’s house, took her to the mall out in Concord where they had a spending spree, and then brought the car back to me before I woke up.”

            “How did you find out about it?” Alice asks.

            Violet pauses, thinking hard, her thick grey hair damp around her face. “You know, I can’t remember. All I know is that he did steal the car.”

            “And got away with it!” I exclaimed, turning off the shower, wringing my hair and suit and heading out into the locker room.

            “Yes, I suppose he did,” Violet muses, grabbing her own towel off the hook and wrapping it around herself.

            “All I know is…” Alice calls out to us, “…is that my granddaughter is the type not to be trusted. She’d steal from herself if she could!”

            We all laughed. Stealing from ourselves. That is a funny idea.

            What would I steal from myself I wonder? I have nothing of value. Though I do have Aunt Lucille’s moonstone ring hidden away in one of my pasta boxes.

            It’s worth something. My mom said at least $5000 dollars.

            I’d steal that.

            Though since I’ve had it, I’ve never worn it. Too valuable. It might get lost.

            Or stolen.

            “5 MINUTES! 5 MINUTES LADIES!” One of the lifeguards hollers at us.

            Violet shakes her head. “They are off by 2 minutes. I’m going to go tell them.”

            “Go Violet!” I say as she marches out of the room, her jaw firmly set, eyes of steel. I wonder if she ever stole anything?

            I bet she did.

            And Alice?

            I know she did!