Rudetopia!

“They are rude as shit!”  Mad Woman who usually never speaks to me hisses. She’s just gotten in my lane, kicked out of hers cuz of the Rusty Hinges.  “Oh, whoops, sorry!” she hastens to apologize. I grin, “Don’t worry about it. I know exactly what you mean.”

“It’s just that they stand around socializing, taking up half the pool, when the rest of us want to swim!” she exclaims.

“Yeah,” I agree.

And then think about how she’s right. About the socializing, sure, but also their rudeness. What is it about the Rusty Hinges group? They all have arthritis, and so hence the name, Rusty Hinges, but does having arthritis entitle one to rudeness? And they are pretty rude. I get it mostly in the locker room. Once, I remember I put my swim bag on a stool and then turned around to open my locker and one of the Rusty Hinges had hobbled up behind me and unceremoniously dumped my bag on the ground and grabbed the stool out from behind me.

RUDE!!!

And there are numerous times where I smile and say “Hi” to one or another of them going out to the pool and all they do is GLARE at me. Like why? What did I do? Is it because I’m not 60 pounds overweight and limping along with my suitcase in tow?

Again, RUDE!

So, when Woman Who Usually Doesn’t Speak to me got in my lane today and spouted her frustration, I had to agree. They are Rude!

The guy who has been swimming with me has now stopped at the wall. He’s grinning and clueless. I nod toward him, speaking to Mad Woman, “I’m getting out. You can have my lane. And this guy…..” I nod toward Clueless Man, “I think he’s okay. Knows how to hold his lane and all.”

Although, before Mad Woman’s appearance, I’d been the Rude One. Clueless Man had asked to share my lane, and yeah, I had moved over to let him in, but I didn’t answer him. Did I glare at him? 

Probably. And then I felt guilty, remembering the time that the woman told me I couldn’t share her lane. It’s not like I went this far, but I wasn’t exactly welcoming. So, after a few laps, when we were both at the wall, I’d asked him if he was okay swimming against the wall. He beamed. “Sure, I’m fine. Thanks for asking.” And then took off back down the lane.

Was he just a nice guy? Or clueless? Or was I being too sensitive, yet again?

In any case, now Mad Woman nods when I tell her I’m getting out. “Oh, thank you thank you! I just will NEVER come here again! I mean, not during the class! They are so RUDE!”

Now we all laugh. It’s funny since she has a lane again. Clueless Guy pushes off the wall, He doesn’t quite say, “Nice talking to you two,” but he seems to have said it.

Mad Woman proceeds to sort all of her equipment on the deck, hand paddles, weight thingees, kickboard, water bottle. I heave myself out of the pool, suddenly so exhausted as the Rusty Hinges soundtrack begins, “It’s just my magination…..”

I scurry past their instructor, who can't stop smiling as she leads them in their Rusty Exercises. They are all so happy now.  Who knew they could be so Rude?