Thursday, September 26, 2013

Hair by the Numbers



“Hey DL!” P yanks at another tangle before shoving a lock in DL’s face.
“Smell my hair! I used that Suave Coconut Conditioner yesterday and my hair still smells like it!”
DL takes an obligatory sniff, “I like that stuff.”
“Yeah, me too. At least the smell. It does have staying power that way. But it dries my hair out.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, I think so. Well, it’s hard to tell cuz swimmers have notoriously wrong dry hair anyway, but the Suave isn’t great for the moisturizing hair situation” (MHS).
She nods, “I never knew that. I use the shampoo and I thought it dried my hair out, but now that you mention it…..” DL’s voice trails off. Lost in Hair Moisture Reverie Situation (HMRS)? “What kind do you use instead that’s better for the moisture situation?”

“Well, I got some huge tubs of Tres Semme conditioner, but it’s shitty too. Of course, I won’t throw it out; I’m too cheap. I used to use Finesse, but then I dunno…..”
P yanks at another tangle as the YMCA girl comes swooping through the locker room to collect towels, “5 minutes, Ladies! 5 minutes!” she hollers at them cheerfully.
DL rolls her eyes, “You know what you should do, P?”
“What?”
“You should find out what kind of Product is good for the Moisturizing Restoration Situation” (MRS).

“Yeah, that’s a good idea.”
“And you should find out the prices too. Like give us the Product from cheapest to most expensive.”
“OKAY! Good idea. And then I can put it on the blog!”
“Yah! Put it on the blog.”
And so, here P is writing the blog but without the full research product situation finished. Cuz to be honest, she tried, but it gave her a headache. All that Product. And then the prices? She never even got to that point.

She just found some funny pictures, which she’ll put on the blog and then she’ll do the price point research later.

Just kidding.
She’ll never do that. Numbers hurt her head. And her hair.
Do numbers hurt hair? How could that be? Can you just picture it? You’re standing in the pool and all of a sudden a bunch of numbers come raining down on the swimmers’ heads. 9’s and 3’s and 4’s and 7’s and then even two digit numbers like 22 and 77 and 88 and why are these the same number? They could be numbers like 34 and 59 and ....

And the numbers would be different colors. The 3’s could be orange. And the 4’s could be lime. And the 9’s could be aqua.
Can you see the numbers?

And then the numbers could also play music. The 5’s could play a phrase from Beethoven and the 2’s could sing out some Schubert.
Can you hear the numbers?

P can. But then, she’s got a vivid visual imagination when it comes to the pool. And her hair. And numbers?

Surprisingly, these too. She owes this to Suave, though, and her tangled mass of tresses.
Product anyone?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

It's all about the product! I make my selection based on smell and price, but smell is usually the first consideration. If it makes my hair less bad so much the better. And numbers, well, they do hurt my head. Often when I'm swimming I think about numbers and I add them to figure out how much longer I should swim. And then I think about the nature of the their existence and if 6 + 4 = 10, then why is when you are swimming the sixth lap you have to swim four more to equal ten. I am missing something basic here.

Thanks for the fun post >^..^<

Cj said...

Hey AnonymousCat--

I think you've never missed a beat! Smell first and numbers never!

That's the secret to Product and Laps!

Thanks again for your great insights on the stories!

Purrs from P
Cj