Friday, July 02, 2010

Flirting?





“Lordy it’s crazy out there in that Pool!” Gargantuan Splitting Out of Her Suit women sighs loudly, shaking her head.

PP tries not to turn and run the other way. She’s at Hilltopia, in the sauna, and had already taken a gander at the pool. It was pure kidtopia mayhem.

“And only one lifeguard,” Another Woman comments. PP can’t see her in the dark. But it doesn’t matter. The dialogue will speak for itself.

“It’s so cloudy in the pool. I don’t know how the lifeguard sees anything!” Gargantuan Woman observes.
“Yes. I am very concern about this.” A Timid Accented Woman pipes in.
“Why’s that?” GW asks.
“I need to find out the….” She hesitates, searching for a word. PP isn’t sure where TAW's from since she’s terrible at accents and identifying their origin. Maybe this woman is Eastern European? Russian? Who cares, she has something to say.

Timid Accented Woman wraps her arms around herself, hugging herself to demonstrate what she’s trying to say. PP is confused. How do you say ‘hug yourself’?

“…..I need to find the rule that tell about the….flirting?” she ventures.
“I don’t think there are any rules about flirting,” GW answers.
“Maybe….I …..” TAW pauses again, “….it is when ….I don’t want my daughter to see.”
“What exactly don’t you want your daughter to see?” PP cuts in, impatient for the story.
“The man and the woman. They were in the pool and they were….I don’t want my daughter to see.”
“How old is your daughter?” PP asks.
“7 and half.”
“And what exactly were they doing?” PP presses.
TAW wraps her arms around herself again, “I think it was the ….flirting? I think they were…..” She pauses again, embarrassed, “I hope that there was no discharge. I don’t want my daughter to see that.”

No discharge? Did she just say that? She can’t find the word for sex but she can for discharge?





The wonders of ESL. Gotta love it.

“You mean they was foolin around in the pool? With the kids there?” GW snorts.
“I think so,” TAW nods. “I need to see if there is a rule that doesn’t allow that flirting.”
“It’s more than flirting,” PP interrupts. “And yes, absolutely, they should NOT be having sex in the pool.”

PP feels like such an old fuddy duddy saying this. But on the other hand, it’s completely gross! Semen in the pool? Yucky!

She just doesn’t even want to think about this. Unless the couple was attractive. But this seems unlikely. PP has seen very few ‘attractive’ couples in the Hilltopia Y pool. Not to say that there aren’t any. But just not to PP’s aesthetic which is completely superficial.




“The lifeguard seen it?” GW asks.
“I’m not sure,” TAW answers. “I think probably so.”
“Yeah, you can see everything from above,” Someone Else observes.

PP wonders if this is true. Theoretically it could be. But the lifeguards at Hilltopia seem more detached and spaced out than any she’s seen. They either stare into space or text on their phones.

Evidently, they’re missing out on the show.

“I wonder I should report this?” TAW asks. “I have no evidence.”
"You don’t need no evidence!" GW cries.
“But it’s just my word against theirs."
“That don’t matter. They need to know. You tell them up front. You let them know. Then they’ll tell the lifeguard. They need to be trained."
“Yeah, they’re all very young. They’re embarrassed to say anything,”PP adds.
“Yes, but if they have the training then they will," GW continues, incensed.

Yet, PP wonders if this is true. If she were a lifeguard and had to tell some couple to stop 'flirting' in the pool, would she?

Well, she thinks you all know the answer to that!

2 comments:

DHBF said...

All in favor of "flirting" in the pool, and why not... don't we all want to wink and wave and smile at the adorable PP after all... but "making out" is a whole "base" beyond flirting, so maybe that's what squeamish-accent-lady saw... but hey, that's still a few bases away from fluids, or... "discharge of seamen"?... which sounds like sailors getting fired... in the pool...?

CJ said...

Ahoy, Matey!