Showing posts from July, 2008

The Green Goddess Weeps

“I am weeping….”

DL gaped across Utopia’s suddenly spooky dimness. Looking like she was ready to weep herself. Later she admitted that she’s prone to ‘Empathetic Crying’ while PP is just prone to Empathetic Shock.

How did it get to this point? PP wonders.

When first they’d entered Utopia, DW had been in high spirits. Hailing the two of them enthusiastically: “HEY! How’re you doin? I am Salad Dressing tonight!”
And DL and PP had laughed, mystified as usual, but delighted with the food aspect of the conversation.
“What kind of Salad Dressing are you? Italian?” PP had joked,
Waving her aside, DW frowned, then grinned, “NO! I am Avocado!”
Of course, she is the Green Goddess tonight, DL had dubbed her later and PP had to concur, since DW’s brown soft body was covered in the ‘avocado dressing’ from head to toe, her face a mask of gooey green liquid, her belly breasts, arms, legs covered thickly with the slimy concoction.

“Avocado?” PP had queried, always eager to keep the conversation flowing in U…

That Sparkle in Her Eye....

“I would give up my career for snowboarding!”

Unable to keep her jaw from dropping, PP stares at Woman with the Beautiful Breasts in rapt astonishment. For the past 10 minutes or so, she’d been going on and on and on about how much she LOVED LOVED LOVED snowboarding and PP, hating the snow and actually any sport that involved ‘adventure’ musta had a look of perplexed incredulity on her mug even though DL was going along with the snowboard rhapsodizing but this coulda just been cuz of WBB breasts, and yeah hell, PP knows that it’s politically incorrect to be ogling & writing about breasts all the time, but she’d been sharing a lane with this woman every Wednesday night for the last 6 months and the cleavage underwater show was motivating to say the least, so this night, when finally PP had time to engage her in Hot Tube chit chat and WBB went gaga crazy about Snowboarding, PP was suitably delighted.

Beautiful Breasts and a Daredevil! Hell, no wonder she liked swimming with her.

But …

Arcata Sauna Shed --Part II

Dear Readers,
This is probably self-evident given the title of this post, but please read yesterday's story before perusing this one;anxious though you may be to be 'caught up' with the latest PP Blog!

“Fine. Fine. Yourself?”
PP sighs inwardly. Thank goodness for DHBF.
“Pretty good….pretty good…..” DPK’s voice surprises her. He sounds…. normal. Not like a weirdo at all. Though PP couldn’t tell you what a Weirdo sounds like. It’s just that now she has to re-evaluate. He’s not a Druggie Psycho Killer after all.

See, appearances can be deceiving!

Yet, she’s reserving judgment for now. It’s early still.

DHBF glances over at her, grinning. He likes to talk. (She’s gonna get in trouble for writing that, but it’s true.) “So, you come here often?” he asks.
PP can’t believe he said that and, in fact, he probably didn’t, but conversation in the sauna by its very nature usually starts off with the Banal.
“Yeah….I try to,” Not A Weirdo nods. “Whenever I get a chance. You folks from around h…

The Arcata Sauna Shed--Part I

Perched haphazardly on the edge of one of the crummy lounge chairs, PP stares in spite of herself. She doesn’t want to watch him as he rolls up first one plaid pant leg and then the other, his mottled face and shaggy hair out of a horror film. Or one of Josh Emmons' (see above cutie pic) effortlessly captured Eureka Characters ala The Loss of Leon Meed. Or what must be a prevalent element here in Humboldt County—- A Prime Suspect Druggie Psycho Killer.

Okay, she knows this is a little extreme. But he definitely was a weirdo. At least upon first stare after PP finished her blissful but slightly chilly swim in the lovely Arcata Pool, now soaking up the warmth of the hot tub with the Blind Man and another couple innocuous swimmers. (Yes, there is a Blind Man that swims at the Arcata pool. Has PP written about him before? ) She hasn’t actually ever seen him in the pool, only in the Hot Tub, but he was here the last time she visited. His vacant eyes and sagging jowl scaring her too. Wh…

Utopian Gyrations Take 2

“I was very intrigued…..” Breast Exerciser Woman was back, or shall PP say Front? For of course, as soon as she entered the sauna, she began her Breast Pumping. Once again, PP tried, unsuccessfully, not to stare. Though this time, since she’d witnessed the extraordinary mammary gyrations previously, she was not quite so spellbound.

Well, maybe a little.

“….I heard the two of you talking the other day….”

“They’re always talking!” She’s A Type exclaimed, shaking her head as she pulled out a nail file and began to scour away at the heels of her right foot. PP tried not to watch. It was kinda gross actually. The things women did, in complete unabashed abandon in the sauna, still struck her sometimes.

The Breast Pumping. This she could handle.
The filing of the foot.
Not so much.

Breast Exerciser Woman ignored SAT’s comment, continuing with her observation. “When I heard you talking the other day, I thought to myself. You have such interesting lives! One of you is married to a doctor. The oth…

Utopian Gyrations

"It was wildly unexpected!" DL murmured as PP unlocked the Geo's door for her.

Nodding, PP started to giggle. "Yes it certainly was," as she recalled their recent Utopian Experience.

One would think, after 50 long years, that PP had seen it all. Esp. since she's frequented gyms, saunas and pools at such wide range. Yet nothing in her past life, the life before she saw Them, had prepared her for this moment.

It was as if They had a life of their own. And judging from DL's expression on the other side of the sauna, her dark eyes wide with wondrous mirth behind her wire-rimmed glasses, PP was not alone in her astonishment.

How can PP even describe what she saw before her? Directly in the line of her sight. Only a mere 2 to 3 feet in front of her? PP didn't even pretend not to stare. If she could have. Which she couldn't.

For right before her eyes, in all their perfect bouncing glory, were two astonishing gyrating breasts circling before her in wild ab…

A Modest Pool Proposal

Cringing, PP sighed inwardly. Goddammit. Why the hell would anyone bring their BABY to HER Vichy Springs Resort? Didn’t they know that she hates babies? Esp. when she wants peace and quiet and rest and relaxation in and around her pool?

What is the Resort World coming to?

Traipsing across the serene lawn under the giant oaks, PP shook her head as the baby deer scattered under a faraway picnic table. They’d heard the baby too and they were gonna get as far away as possible.


Of course, DHBF commiserated with her as soon as she started to complain about the Wee One. But only up to a point. He has kids. He raised babies. So he got it on a level that PP didn’t. What’re you gonna do with the baby when you go on vacation?

Throw it in the Pool?

Now, here’s a Modest Proposal ala Swift but modified to fit with PP’s Pool Peace Necessity.

Just toss the crying brat into the pool and watch it sink. That’s would shut it up.

But what if it didn’t sink? Those babies …

Clear Lake? (It's not!)

PP loved their little cabin at Indian Beach Resort! The front porch afforded a fine view of the other visitors--serious, hardworking fishermen and women; an exhausted mom and her exuberant son playing ping pong; a stupid Dad riding his kid's training wheel bike.

If only the Lake hadn't been quite so cold! But more on this later...

PP decides to brave the Lake in the morning before the sun rises too high and too hot. But her decision is not without trepidation....

Hah! PP surprises herself with the morning Lake Swim. It's cold, yes. But smooth and green and other-worldly. Maybe she can become more of a lake swimmer after all? (Though she'll never compare to the Lovely I's Lake Swimming passion! Why the LI even has special dresses to wear to Lake Anza before she swims. Now that's a True Lake Swimmer!) PP is herself, obviously a pool swimmer, but her first love is the ocean. She so misses plunging into the waves at 17th Street or Moonlight Beach, the salty water rus…

Turd Alert!


PP did NOT just spy a Turd of Human Feces on the floor next to the toilet at the YMCA?

Of course, her first reaction was disbelief. How the hell could anyone leave a turd on floor next to the toilet? It was beyond her reality. She simply maintained Turd Denial for a few moments.

Then it was, what should she do? Run out and tell the Beautiful Tibetan Woman up at the front counter that there was a Turd on the floor in the Women's Locker room? Yeah, right. PP could just picture BTW wrinkling her pert little nose in horrific distaste before making the call to have someone go clean it up.

Yet, PP didn't do this. Mostly cause she was naked and really had to go to the bathroom, but also cause she didn't want the Y to get shut down by the Health Dept--Hell, turd or no turd, it was her only pool right now.

Plus, her mind started reeling....who could have done such an abdominal action? It wasn't like little kids were running around the women's locker room, wrecking thei…