PP really wants to write this blog about the Lovely I’s marvelous road to recovery and their first trip to Mills without the wheelchair, but she’s so tired. (PP is, well, actually, the Lovely I is tired too, esp. after their swim.)
"Why am I so tired after coming here to Mills? she had asked. I mean. I can go to water therapy and do my water walking for 40 or even 45 minutes and I’m not this tired!”
“It’s the Hot Tub,” PP volunteers. “It saps all your energy.”
“Mmm…..you might have something there.”
“We spent the day looking at faucets,” Fix It GF announces as PP drives the Geo down Hwy 580, toward the Pool. “You wouldn’t believe how advanced they are now. No washers. They’re flexible. They have this special attachment so that you don’t get scalded when someone flushes the toilet.”
“That’s what I don’t get!” The Lovely I leans forward from the back seat. “How can scalding be such a Huge Issue? I mean, I’ve never been scalded in the shower from someone flushing the toilet.”
“Me neither,” agrees PP. “But I live alone. The only way I could get scalded is if Pablo decided to flush the toilet while I was in the shower.”
Fix-it GF and the Lovely I crack up.
“You laugh, but did I send you guys that video of the cat flushing the toilet?”
“No…..I don’t think so….” The Lovely I hesitates.
“Well, it was pretty funny. This guy was getting this huge water bill and thinking what the hell is up with that? And later he discovers that it’s the cat. He’s down there in the basement, flushing the toilet over and over again with his little kitty paw so he can watch the water swirl down.”
“You’re kidding!” Fix-it GF exclaims as the Lovely I chuckles her cute, “Heee Heee Heee….”
“Have you seen the movie, Something something something the Weeping Camel something something…..” The Lovely I asks PP who can’t remember all the longness of the title. Those documentaries. They’re so specific.
“No….” of course PP hasn’t seen it. She just rents really stupid Netflix fare like Drew Barrymore and Hugh Grant making silly music together and then having sex under the grand piano.
Come to think of it, maybe that’s not such a bad idea…..
Anyway, the Weeping Camel film really impressed the Lovely I who narrates the cutest part as they make their way across the parking lot to the pool, the Lovely I actually walking up the stairs by herself without PP or Fix-it GF’s help whatsoever.
“You would love this movie, PP!” LI exclaims. “It’s just so cute. When the little camel calf is born, imagine, its little hump is FOLDED OVER! How considerate!”
PP giggles as she imagines a folded over hump all soft and gray atop the baby.
It does sound cute, but frankly, not as good as the Sex under the grand piano.
“So, I hafta tell you, PP,” the Lovely I stands up in the Hot Tub gently stroking the surface of the warm water back and forth as PP climbs in. “I had a dream about you.”
PP is so flattered. The Lovely I had a dream about her? Too cool!
“I was in this store, I don’t know where it was exactly, but it was your birthday and I wanted to get you something, so of course I thought of some Cat Chotchkee (PP knows she’s spelling that wrong, but you know what she means.) and so I did find this purrfect Cat Chotchkkee I can’t remember exactly what it was, but I was very worried that you wouldn’t want it or like it and then you came into the store and I thought ohmygod I hafta hide it from you and then It broke!”
The Lovely I paused, crestfallen for a moment.
PP grinned, “That’s ok. There’s a moratorium on Cat Knickknacks anyway. You must have known this ….”
”Do you mean that in my unconscious I somehow knew that you had a Cat Chotkee moratorium?”
“But how could she know?” Fix-it GF asks, puzzled and practical.
PP shruggs. “It’s just a pool cat telepathy thing I guess.”
“Have you read this?” Fix it GF hands PP a library book while they’re waiting for the Lovely I in the locker room. Something non fiction and political. PP can tell from the cover. She barely glances at it as Fix it GF begins to tell her about it. “It’s really interesting. It’s about how the right wing present day Christian Evangelists are really just like Hitler and the Nazis. How Hitler was considered this total outside nut case until and no one took him seriously. Of course, until it was too late. Just like the right wing Christians in this country.”
”I hope it’s not too late for us,” The Lovely I shakes her head.
Fix It GF sighs. Starts to pack up her stuff to head out to the deck.
PP is in awe of Fix-it GF. She knows everything that PP has no clue about. Faucets. Politics. How to do weights at the Y (You need to be careful to not do more than 15 reps at a time and yeah, I have Neck Issues too. You just have to be careful not to lift any weight over your head.” ) And Shade Vegetables. She has an allergy to them. PP doesn’t even know what a shade vegetable is. Fix It GF educates her: potatoes, tomatoes, eggplant and some other stuffs PP has never even heard of and can’t recall now.
“When’s your birthday?” the Lovely I asks PP on the way home after their exhausting but restorative swim in the late afternoon, the sky blue gold over Downtown Oakland.
“February.” PP answers wondering why she was asking. Maybe she was planning on having another dream?
“Hello Kitty!” Fix-it GF exclaims. “They make a Hello Kitty Vibrator.”
”I already have one,” PP grins, flattered that such a charming Lesbian would even mention such a thing to her.
“Oh…” Undaunted, Fix-It GF ponders for a moment. “How about a Hello Kitty Toaster?”
”Yes, I have that too. It makes toast with Hello Kitty’s Face imprinted on it. I can even make the Toast,” PP brags as she remembers the fancy menu of shade vegetables that was discussed earlier in the locker room.
“I would come over for Hello Kitty Toast,” the Lovely I murmurs wistfully.
“Done!” PP exclaims. She could handle this meal. All she had to do was buy some white bread and make some peppermint tea.
“Your birthday’s coming up, isn’t it?” PP asks LI as she heads over to Hwy 24 and exits at Claremont Ave.
“Yes….” The Lovely I sighs.
“Well, what do you want for your birthday?”
“Oh…..nothing that you guys can get me. What I want for my birthday is completely abstract and non purchasable.”
“Oh, c’mon, try us,” PP pushes.
“I want Muscles for my birthday,” she sighs again.
PP nods as she tries to think of a way to get these for the Lovely I.
“Maybe I could get you some sort of blow up Muscle Model or something like that?” Fix-it GF exclaims as the Lovely I climbs out of the Geo by herself and heads up to their lavender trimmed home.
PP doesn’t think the Lovely I heard this great idea, or if she did, it was just too much for her to respond to in her post swim exhaustion. PP sees how much the Lovely I has improved since several weeks ago. No wheelchair. Walking without trepidation. Swimming again at Mills.
It’s a long road. PP knows this from her own recovery after her surgery so many years ago. 3 weeks to walk a half a block. 3 months before returning to teaching.
But hell, only 10 days till she was back in the Pool even though the doc told her to wait 6 weeks.
6 weeks without swimming? Can you even imagine?
And so, PP sympathizes so much with the Lovely I’s desire to get better faster.
But these bodies of ours. They have their own schedule. And it’s not up for negotiation.
Well, unless of course, Swimming is involved.
"Thanks so much for the ride!" Fix-it GF slams the car door and follows the Lovely I up to the house.
"Yes, it was so nice seeing you again," the Lovely I calls out as she stops to pick up the mail.
Grinning, PP throws the Geo into gear and sighs happily.
It's so nice to see the Lovely I and Fix-it GF again for a swim.
Now if she could just figure out how to have Sex under a Grand Piano!